Irish goodbye

He arrived
As we were discussing proceedings
He'd cut his hair
Was wearing his wedding shoes
He looked small
Broken
Bereft


I rose to meet him
I'd dyed my hair
Was wearing my wedding brooch
I looked tall
Chic
Proud


I put my arms around him
I'd forgotten how much shorter he is
Breathed in his smell for the last time


He sat alone
Uncounseled
As I said yes
I do
Irretrievably broken
Not pregnant


It was over so quickly
Fair and equitable
Defined as me with all the leverage
Thank you, Your Honor


He chose a variation
Of his Irish goodbye
This with a subtle wave
He knows how it's always upset me
Leaving without a word


I saw the back of him recede
Three tears escaping
As I tipped my head skyward


Since I left him
All that time ago
My life has been filled with love
Instead of loneliness
I took those from him
Harnessed them for myself


I want to reach out to him
To share what I have
But I know
From long and weary experience
That he will take it all
Leave me hoping I won't wake tomorrow


So I turn
A subtle wave
Goodbye
Best wishes
I loved you